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Love Hate Relationship .....

Saturday, March 20, 2010


I love my Mum to bits ... but sometimes I juz really dunno what the f*ck is wrong with her . I juz have to resign to my fate that I can NEVER make her happy ...


Had the following SMS conversation with her last week . Totally outta the blue . All started with her demanding one morning that I had to feed the community cats after my morning shift that day , as she had a birthday dinner with some of her frens tat nite . I was not even rude when I replied her wokays !!! I told her nicely I would be coming home late that day as I wanted to go buy some things after work . Then she flared up and said that I was trying to be funny and is being unhelpful . She started lamenting that I "don't allow" her to go Genting , and now I "don't even allow" her to go for her birthday dinner . C'mon everyone , start taking out your tissues and start crying at her sad 'fate' . I was like -_-""" I didn't even say that she can't go for her dinner but I was juz letting her know that I wud be home late tat day , so don't demand that I had to be home by a certain time , HER time to be exact , to feed the community cats . Then , while in the cab to work , I received the following SMS :

Mum : Don't let me suddenly get the wisdom to stop feeding outside cats and oso let all your cats out of the house . Being kind should bring joy , otherwise it has defeat the purpose . I feel workup is because of your bloody attitude , bringing the family into this shit activity and not helping when needed . Don't dare be Randie ! Not only I can throw out all your cats , I can even throw you out ! I owe U nothing now since you are no longer a child and in fact U are owing me for bringing U up !!

Wad the f*cking shit rite ? Who is the one being difficult or unhelpful ??? In the first place , I didn't even say that I was not going to help feed the community cats ! I juz harmlessly mentioned that I will be back late only mah ! Like that also wrong meh ??? And I NEVER "don't allow" her to go Genting nor go for her dumbass dinner !!! Itz a fact that I don't like her to go Genting but I never don't allow her to . Itz totally different meaning wokays ! I mean who will like it when people GAMBLE away their money then tell U they are very poor ? Tink I'm stupid issit ??? Then why shud she get duh when I always tell her I'm poor after spending all my salary on shopping and taxis . She also don't like it wad rite ? But I don't go around saying that she don't allow me to spend MY $ wad . Pfffft ! Anyway , I didn't bother to reply and juz carried on with my journey . Then , when I reached my workplace , I realised that the ward total was low , so I got approval from my manager to clear 1 day AL for that day . I mean so wad I took cab to work , only to take AL . Itz silly but since I don't mind , why should other people do rite ??? I was quite happy in fact , as I could go buy my things AND feed the community cats at their usual feeding time . So itz like killing 2 birds with a stone mah rite ? So I SMS my Mum :

Me : Haha ! I take AL for today . Heading back home soon . So tis evening can feed cats . Yahoo !

Well , guess wad her reply was :

Mum : Hypocrite shit ! I've also cancelled my dinner !

KNN ! So drama ! And she really think I'm so stupid to believe her issit ??? She really think tat I'll believe that she SMS her frens at 7.05AM to cancel their DINNER date . *rolls eyes* Anywayz , I replied :

Me : U can go ahead wad . How am I to know . My ward total remained low . I juz reach my ward . Wahaha .

I was still trying my very best to be nice and polite AND patient to her but she was really pushing it ... :

Mum : Don't cause trouble and use feeding cats to take leave and later blame ME when marked by your hospital ! if U need to take leave just to feed cats after AM shift , it shows that U are not capable , so do not deserve to be a Sister . Drop your study and remain a Staff Nurse cleaning backside as U are meant to be ! So much $ take cab to work then take leave and head home . I think U made yourself a laughing stock in the eyes of your colleagues . Since you have so much $ , consider rent your own flat so that I can sell my house and rid myself of all this shit problem !

It is ALWAYS about $$$ ! Don't she ever get bored talking about nothing BUT $$$ ??? And please lor , I don't think my colleagues are as shallow as HER as to see me as a laughing stock ! Joker yes , but definitely not a stock ! And she always claim that I am the one who got her into the 'shit problem' of community cat feeding . Sometimes I really wonder who got who into this 'shit' ???!!! I started out wif feeding only ONE community cat but now we ended up with almost 20 ... As wad she claims that I seldom help out with the feeding , how did I end up with these 20 ??? Makes no sense lor she ! Obviously she is the one who unintentionally attracted more cats during feeding but this can't be helped wad , we can't turn away a hungry soul rite ??? I mean , I don't even mind that I have to fork out quite a fortune every month to buy cats' supplies and I never once regretted or got angry . I mean I feel good being able to feed some hungry souls and as much as I'd like to do the feeding myself , I really can't because of my erratic work and study schedules and I'm always worn out with all the travelling , so 有钱出钱 , 有力出力 la ! Not as though I don't come out with a single cent AND not help out with the feeding rite ??? At least I did put in some contribution to this 'shit' lor . Still not good enuf one lor . Pfffft ! Anyway , I still tried my best to keep cool and not reply something rude as it'll only make things worse , so I replied :

Me : I already told U I need to buy things after my AM shift so I will be back late . Won't be in time to feed cats . So since the situation permits , I can take AL , my senior NM allow , I can buy my things AND feed the cats , and U can go your dinner . All's well ends well . Aiyah , think what U want lah . I can never make U happy or satisfied anyway .

I mean , fed up rite ???!!! Do also wrong , don't do also wrong ! WTF la ! Anyway , I think the last sentence made an impact , 'coz she gave up and replied :

Mum : Watever U say ! A laughing stock is meant to be !

Yeahhh ! WADEVER lor ! She sees what she sees , she says wad she says , she hears wad she hears , she thinks wad she thinks ... no point trying to reason with such creatures ...

Me : Yeah . I admit , I'm a big time loser , laughing stock , useless , lousy piece of existance like Oi (my tiny cat Nugget) . Wahaha !

I mean , how NOT to b a loser with a specimen like that for a mother ??? I seriously give up liao . I used to cry buckets , thinking why am I such a loser ? Thinking why am I so lousy and not be able to give my parents better lives or more $$$ . I really thought I was the one with a loser problem and I felt truely sad , not 'coz of the names she called me but that I'm such a lousy daughter . But only up till recently I began to realise that NO , I'm NOT the one with the problem , SHE is the one who has ! Never satisfied , never happy , forever critical , no good words for people ... Yes ! I am the normal one !!! And I've stopped crying , and stopped feeling useless . Even though I'm not somebody , at least I'm NOT a nobody lor !


I have not been blogging for a long time but I really do miss doing so . Hahaha !!! Too lazy lah :p . Will try to do so more often . I ALWAYS say that ... :D But at least U know I'm still alive rite ? Well , as if anybody cares ... ;D


Purred Ranz @ {05:46} 0 comments
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NAME : ~Ranz~
D.O.B. : 24th October 1979
JOB : ~Don't mess with the Missy~

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